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| Gap Baby, $34.95, I couldn't resist. |
Tuesday, August 6, 2013
Literal Trinket #10
When I was very young, I remember refusing to close my eyes until I somehow fell asleep. I was that scared of ghosts and goblins-especially the boogy man. Many nights I would feign ear aches just so that I could stay up and watch TV with my parents. I always had ear infections in the summers so my parents never questioned my motives. I would sit watching the screen blankly while tugging on my ear, all just to avoid sleep.
That back fired one day when my parents decided to take action and make an appointment for me regarding this "ear ache." As soon as I learned that I was to be taken to the doctor, I hid behind my queen sized bed while my father yelled trying to find me. I can't tell you what actually happened at the doctor or whether we even made it to the doctor. There's a chance I could have confessed to faking ear aches. I do however remember not getting into any trouble.
One morning I woke up to a perfect sliver across my chest on my sheets. I was convinced a snake had slithered across me during the night. There was also another time, when I must have been a toddler, sleeping in the crib in my playroom. I swore one night that I watched a circus elephant prance across the hallway past my door. Needless to say, the bathroom light was my best friend in the night.
These events were the start of what of what I would characterize as my anxiety. The anxious "what if" of what could happen in the dark. Now the "what ifs" have simply moved into every corner they can find and I've got to find my bathroom lights to control them.
That back fired one day when my parents decided to take action and make an appointment for me regarding this "ear ache." As soon as I learned that I was to be taken to the doctor, I hid behind my queen sized bed while my father yelled trying to find me. I can't tell you what actually happened at the doctor or whether we even made it to the doctor. There's a chance I could have confessed to faking ear aches. I do however remember not getting into any trouble.
One morning I woke up to a perfect sliver across my chest on my sheets. I was convinced a snake had slithered across me during the night. There was also another time, when I must have been a toddler, sleeping in the crib in my playroom. I swore one night that I watched a circus elephant prance across the hallway past my door. Needless to say, the bathroom light was my best friend in the night.
These events were the start of what of what I would characterize as my anxiety. The anxious "what if" of what could happen in the dark. Now the "what ifs" have simply moved into every corner they can find and I've got to find my bathroom lights to control them.
Wednesday, April 24, 2013
Literal Trinket #9
Am I Dating some sort of Christian Gray?
That's what this man has my mom and friends asking. 2 personal assistants-1 for each city. Two condos-1 for each city. Lots of town car usage. Outrageous tips. Spends a great deal of time on an airplane for business. Designer jeans. Ordering Stella Artois chilled on ice to be waiting for him when he arrives to his hotel. What is going on here?
I'm not really sure. He's constantly busy and some of our meet ups have been cancelled or delayed by business matters. Is there a way to work me in or not? Is he serious about having me as a potential wing woman or is this just his fun that he slips in. Does he go from one fling to another? Does he want children? Does he ever think he will slow down his work load? I don't know the answer to any of these. All I know is that I am having fun, and no one has made me feel like such a rare gem.
Updates to follow.
That's what this man has my mom and friends asking. 2 personal assistants-1 for each city. Two condos-1 for each city. Lots of town car usage. Outrageous tips. Spends a great deal of time on an airplane for business. Designer jeans. Ordering Stella Artois chilled on ice to be waiting for him when he arrives to his hotel. What is going on here?
I'm not really sure. He's constantly busy and some of our meet ups have been cancelled or delayed by business matters. Is there a way to work me in or not? Is he serious about having me as a potential wing woman or is this just his fun that he slips in. Does he go from one fling to another? Does he want children? Does he ever think he will slow down his work load? I don't know the answer to any of these. All I know is that I am having fun, and no one has made me feel like such a rare gem.
Updates to follow.
Wednesday, March 27, 2013
TRINKET # 8
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| My treat to myself:Initial Reaction, 1 1/4" Acrylic Script Cutout Monogram Necklace, $62. |
Tuesday, March 26, 2013
Literal Trinket #8
Tonight, just what I needed happened. The movie He's Just Not That Into You was on TV. I think every single girl should watch it once a month-just as a reminder.We all know deep down whether someone is really into us or not, the rest of what we do is false hoping. So if we could just stop ourselves right there-at that false hoping thought stream-we wouldn't get so wrapped up in what we think is such a mystery. These rules provided by the book and movie are all very realistic guidelines, but what really needs to happen is for us to just listen to the voice in the very back of our head. I mean we can't know exactly what the other person is thinking, but we have a gut feeling that comes up after the date. We feel restless about it- he hasn't called but the date wasn't bad. Well, it was probably just ok for him too and he has moved on. Otherwise he would have given you a little text because you were on his mind. If you already left his mind, he's not going to reach out.
It isn't wrong or right. Guys are just more practical. Most girls are either a straight yes or no to them post date 1 or 2. There's no "iffy" prospects left like with us girls. And that's why we need to do the same. Don't date someone that you think would make good company for a while just because you're lonely. If you didn't feel something in your gut that says, "I can't let this one go. There's something about him." Don't reach out again just because you're bored. Yes, you will still be bored, but take that time to invest in yourself. When you least expect it, the right guy, the right situation, the right timing will come into your life so fast you won't even have time to worry or feel restless at all. You'll just be, and it will be wonderful.
And oh, that scene with Scarlet Johansson and Bradley Cooper, where they discuss the possibility of being friends. I think it gave me my answer regarding B O'B. as discussed in Literal Trinket #6.
It isn't wrong or right. Guys are just more practical. Most girls are either a straight yes or no to them post date 1 or 2. There's no "iffy" prospects left like with us girls. And that's why we need to do the same. Don't date someone that you think would make good company for a while just because you're lonely. If you didn't feel something in your gut that says, "I can't let this one go. There's something about him." Don't reach out again just because you're bored. Yes, you will still be bored, but take that time to invest in yourself. When you least expect it, the right guy, the right situation, the right timing will come into your life so fast you won't even have time to worry or feel restless at all. You'll just be, and it will be wonderful.
And oh, that scene with Scarlet Johansson and Bradley Cooper, where they discuss the possibility of being friends. I think it gave me my answer regarding B O'B. as discussed in Literal Trinket #6.
Thursday, March 21, 2013
Literal Trinket #7
Why is it that I finally feel the confidence to tell the ex-boyfriend that I am ok to be at the same get- togethers, but right after I type it I start to cry? That doesn't seem right. I hope the sudden outpouring of tears is my way of healing from the break-up. But I think the tears are coming from the good memories that I no longer get to live. And that could take more time to accept as past. That's what I want more than anything-the ability to live in the moment. I'm constantly thinking ahead or behind. When you do that, what is the point of living your life? All the good stuff is in the present. Someone also once told me, "If you don't expect things, you won't be disappointed." That sounds really simple, but it's so hard to do. I am constantly expecting things from situations. I am constantly "what-ifing" the future when I should be putting all my energy into the present. Deal with what's happening now. Make good decisions concerning the now. The future is the future for a reason. There are also many things I can't control. I can't control what people will do. I can only control myself and build my life. And I think that calls for a Namaste.
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